Jairek Robbins | A Real Talk on Love and Legacy
Jairek Robbins is a number one bestselling author. He's also a performance coach and lifestyle entrepreneur. He has dedicated his life to helping people achieve success by living with purpose in life and business. At 23 years old, Jairek was awarded the gold medal congressional award from United States Congress. He's conducted trainings for a variety of companies and organizations including Harvard University, The United States Marines, The United States Airforce, Special Forces, BMW, RE/MAX, UBS, Major League Baseball teams and members of the U.S. Olympic team. He's a trusted advisor and board member to a variety of different companies and today at 34 years old with over a decade of performance coaching experience, he continues to unlock secrets for maximizing performance and organizational success. In this episode, Jairek will delve deep into some of the mindset tools and techniques that have enabled him to get to where he is today.
1. Start with a Vision
Jairek has learned that it’s always good start with a vision. His has a 20-year vision. If you're one of those people that do things because they're just supposed to, you won't go far. You need to work backwards. Think of the result you actually want long-term in your life, in your health, emotions, family, finances and business. Think of where you want to be in all these parts of your life and think of what half-way there will look like 10 years from now. Go on and look at what the quarter mark looks like, then what five years look like from now. What are the tangible results you'd have and how you'd feel and what would go on and what would your bank account look like and what would your health and diet look like? Get specific.
Then go ahead and work all the way back down. What does this year have to look like to be on track for 20 years? If you're going to add it up, you have to know where you're going to be 12 months from now. What about 6 months from now? Do this all the way back to what do you have to do today? Now, if you decide to do something today, you know that the reason you're doing that specific thing every day is for the next 20 years you’ll know exactly where you will end up.
Jairek aims that at 50 years old, he will be healthier and stronger than the majority of 20-year-olds in the world. Emotionally, he wants to be passionate about his life, living on mission and enjoying every moment life has to offer. He hopes that he will be passionately in love with his wife and every day their love will be growing deeper. Business-wise, he aims to have 10 + companies that are making over $100 million a year in profit.
2. Building Relationships
Jairek shares how he managed to find his wife, Amanda. He was lucky that he found a partner who is as committed to doing the work every day to build their relationship. Earlier in their relationship, they had agreed that they were going to learn and read and practice on their relationship. They realized that building their relationship would be a process and some days they might have meltdowns and not know which way is up but they would be willing to stick with each other long enough to figure it out.
Jairek learned not to approach relationships thinking, "Here's what I want. I want someone who's this tall, who looks like this, who act like this, who loves these things and who does these things." He initially was looking for what he could get out of a relationship instead of what he was showing up to try and give to the relationship. This realization was a game changer to his friendships and business relationships. What was he there to give? He sat down and got really clear on what his gifts were. What are the things that he could bring to the table that are unique to him alone? The things he could give 24/7 because it's just part of his DNA and it's just who he is. And then he had to share with another human being, are these the type of gifts you value in any way, shape or form in your life?
3. Learn from Successful People
To be successful, Jairek has learned that it is important to find people who have experienced what he wants and ask what they have done—find out their habits and routines. There might be people who may think they are creative, artistic and not a carbon copy of anyone else. They may not want to copy other people and they may want to create their own way. This is absolutely wrong. Use the life experiences of other people to save yourself years of headache. Use the results that are there and once you get good at using what's there then customize it, adjust it, and tweak it to be your own unique twist or style or flavor. At that point you will know not only what works, but what works for you.
Once you figure out what works for you, the next stage is how do you automate it? How do you make it unconscious competence that you do it every day without having to think about it? In order to do this, you need three things. First, you need a trigger, something that sets it off. You need a routine, how you go about it and you need a reward to reward your nervous system with pleasure to say, "Good job, do it again." You have to build in these habits consciously on purpose. Build one each time and keep doing it until its part of who you are.
4. Morning Routine
A research from Harvard says if you were to write down three things you're grateful for each day for 30 days in a journal, at the end of 30 days, your overall happiness and satisfaction of life will improve. You will be happier in your life just by doing this simple task. Realize that you are already blessed because most people live under $2 under a day.
For 20 years now, Jairek has gotten up in the morning and done a gratitude morning routine. When he was in high school, he would do it at 5:30 a.m. before football practice. He would just run around the neighborhood and in his mind tried to figure out what he was grateful for. After the three minutes of gratitude, he would do three minutes of future and vision planning. He would try to figure out what his future would look like. Though his vision has adjusted over the years, he would always be thinking about what he was excited about in the future. The things, the moments and the special opportunities that he was very excited about for the future. Thirdly, he would visualize who he was going to be today. How was he going to choose to show up in this world today? He would then mentally rehearse it.
Jairek's morning routine starts with meditation. He then spends time with his wife reviewing their future vision. They just empty out their minds and then they just flood it with the things they want to be focused on consciously and subconsciously. After this, they go work out. When they were in San Diego, Jairek and his wife would have a gratitude walk. They'd go on a three mile walk together and share everything they're grateful for about each other out loud with each other. Then they'd talk about everything they're excited about and the future they're going to do together and share together. They'd then hit the gym afterwards. Now because they are in Miami Beach, they don’t have the walk. Jairek goes straight down to the gym after reading his future vision and after he's done working out, then he comes back and then they share with each other.
Everything in life has a purpose. The moment you no longer serve a purpose in the ecosystem, you will be eliminated. This is how the ecosystem works. So realize, if you're still breathing and alive, there's a reason. Discovering what the reason is, we might spend too much time on this. So we should therefore step back and figure out, if you're looking for a purpose as far as what your purpose can be in your profession or an opportunity, you should look at what you love to do.
The second piece is, what are you actually talented at? If you can mix this together, you can start to see things that you'd be passionate about. These are the types of things that when you're done doing, you have more energy than when you started. So after you look at what you love and what you are good at and you mix these together, you start to see things that generally you would succeed in.
Before you use your passions to start a business around, go back to list the things you love. Take a highlighter, highlight the ones that are absolute sacred and just for you because these you should never turn into a business because they're your sacred things. Do not let these turn into a business where you try to monetize that to anybody else just because you love it, they're yours. The rest of the stuff that you love and the stuff that also qualifies as something you're talented at, go to a third list. Look at what people want, not what they need.
The third thing is what are they willing to pay for? When you overlap all four of these, what you love to do, minus out the sacred stuff, what you're actually talented at, what people want, not what they need and what they're willing to pay for. Out of these four lists combined you should get about three to five options that would qualify as something you could do that you'd be very passionate about and could turn it into an opportune business for yourself.
Fulfillment for Jairek is that moment when you are 100% content and fulfilled with every breath in your body not needing to do a single thing more to feel completely full and to know that you as a living, breathing being are more than enough and you're really done it. The moment when you can confirm in your mind that you've lived fully, you loved deeply and you did something that mattered with your life. You'll be able to sit there and feel fulfilled in that moment knowing, if you were to die at that moment, you would just high five yourself for a life well lived. Every day you can design your life in a way that you wake up and you give your all and at the end of the day, you can look at whether you did something that mattered or something that will long outlive your physical presence on the planet?
LIVE IT!: Achieve Success By Living With Purpose – Jairek Robbins
In Sync with the Opposite Sex- Alison Armstrong
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